Oh my god. Its been weeks since I last updated my blog. I feel..so guilty? lol I know its nothing but yes, I am guilty over this! Guilty for not updating my blog! Sorry dearey! hahaha Anyway, I do have reasons of why I haven’t been updating my blog lately.
Well to start with, I’ve started work. (Yes, Elaine is workin again). Actually, not exactly working since I don’t get paid. Lol..( sometimes I wonder.. If only I did my internship in Swiss.. I wud be getting Rm6K plus per mth..Well, need to minus the expenses n stuff)… But I didn’t regret my decision of coming back here, coz I was in the point of a serious breakdown, and I am happy being here!
Okay, so… yes..I’m working right now.. so that explains why I haven’t been that free to update my blog.. The moment I reach home, I’d be so worked out…so tired…and if only there was nothing wrong with my laptop, at least I cud online from my bed..but..sigh…
I will try to update my blog as often as I could… I will try.. 
Actually, I wanted to post up pictures of the wedding I attented 2 days ago, but its late right now and I need my rest..huhuhuhu oh………….(workin again tomorrow…)
Anyway, there’s something I needed to talk about here. Just to release some of my emotions… You know when someone/few ppl had hurt u so badly in the past, that the wound had never totally recovered though u think it had? Well I learnt that greatly 2 days ago. It was after attending my friend’s brother’s wedding, that we all headed to Bluenote for the ‘after party of the wedding’..Then I saw my ex’s family…From the brothers, to the uncle, to the aunt.. to the in law… Then it hit me.. I have always told my friends that I let bygones be bygones… and that the pain had recovered. I truly believe in the sentence ‘ forgiven but not forgotten’, but seeing them, made me realize that.. there’s so much hurt in me… that I figured thats why I am, the way that I am. There are no words to describe how do I feel towards them, towards him. But if I were to ever face them, a single slap to him, or the in law, or whoever in that family, and without me saying a thing, would simply be enough for me.
Sigh I cant believe I said all that. I’ve never been the person who’s so full of anger…I somehow sounded as though Im so full of vengeance. But no. All this while I told myself I’ve forgiven them, well..that’s what I thought. But seeing them…I realized, I haven’t.
Only god knows what had happened and what I went through. Never had I imagined that what had happened before would ever happen to me. Forgiven but not forgotten… Have I really? Really forgave them? Now I dare say, No I haven’t. I hope I will never ever have to see them in my lifetime anymore. Especially him. Why was I so naive? LIARS! I hate hypocrites, I hate liars. I seriously do. Gosh, If i were given the chance to, I would really slap u. I have no words to say to u anymore but I would slap u. I would.
And there are other things that have been borthering my mind lately. And sometimes I wish I knew what to say and what to do. I wouldn’t want to offend anybody, let alone offend few people that I know. Sigh I wish I knew what to do. For now, I’d just go with the flow. Maybe that’s for the best.
Ok.. now that I’ve released some of that tension, Im ready to go for bed now. And tomorrow will be a new day, as any other day! Will update soon, hopefully this time, with pictures, guys! tata~
Enjoy this song, I Learned From The Best by Whitney Houston.
